Skip to main content

Is there NO CHANCE OF RECONCILIATION?

Image
By
California Attorney Mark B. Baer started another great discussion on a LinkedIn group I belong to entitled:

ARE THERE OTHER FAMILY LAW ATTORNEYS WHO TRY AND HELP THEIR CLIENTS TO IMPROVE THEIR MARRIAGES BEFORE DISSOLVING THEM?

The answer is yes, and here were my comments in response to this discussion:
In Massachusetts the standard for a no-fault divorce is irretrievable breakdown and the party (or parties) requesting the divorce must testify under oath that their marriage has irretrievably broken down with no chance of reconciliation. Whenever I provide an initial consultation, I ask that question very seriously and slowly, emphasizing the "no chance of reconciliation." In many cases it is clear that the potential client hadn't considered their desire for a divorce from that standpoint, and in many cases they have difficulty stating that there is no chance of reconciliation. 

Because of the hesitation that so many potential clients show, I always inform them that I am not in the business of ending marriages, but rather in the business of helping dissolve the business partnership of a marriage when spouses have already come to the decision that their marriage is over. I am also not trained as a therapist, and so I recommend that if they are not sure about their decision, that they consult with a therapist either individually or as a couple before deciding whether to move forward with a divorce. 

Any attorney that doesn't ask that question, in my opinion, doesn't understand that the role of a family law attorney is different than in other areas of the law. We have to be sensitive to the fact that the decisions and positions we help advocate for have impacts far beyond the courtroom, both on the emotional well-being of our clients, and especially on their children. 

- Justin L. Kelsey, Esq.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What is the purpose of the Divorce Nisi waiting period?

By
In Massachusetts the statutory waiting period after a Judgment of Divorce and before the divorce becomes final (or absolute) is called the Nisi period. After a divorce case settles or goes to trial, a Judgment of Divorce Nisi will issue and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days. This waiting period serves the purpose of allowing parties to change their mind before the divorce becomes final. If the Judgment of Divorce Nisi has issued but not become final yet, and you and your spouse decide you don't want to get divorced, then you can file a Motion to Dismiss and the Judgment will be undone. Although many of my clients who are getting divorced think the idea of getting back together with their ex sounds crazy, I have had cases where this happened. In addition to offering a grace period to change your mind, the Nisi period has three other legal effects: 1. The most obvious effect of the waiting period is that you cannot remarry during the Nisi period, be
74 comments
Read more

Does a Criminal Record affect Child Custody?

By
If one of the parents in a custody case has a criminal record, the types of crimes on their record could have an effect on their chances of obtaining custody. In custody cases the issue is always going to come down to whether or not the best interests of the child might be affected. In the most extreme case, in which one parent has been convicted of first degree murder of the other parent, the law specifically prohibits visitation with the children until they are of a suitable age to assent. Similarly, but to a less serious degree, in making custody and visitation determinations the court will consider crimes that would cause one to question the fitness of a parent. These types of crimes would obviously include any violent crime convictions which could call into question whether the children would be in danger around a parent who has shown themselves to resort to violence when faced with conflict. In addition, drug and alcohol abuse offenses would call into question a parent&#
65 comments
Read more

What happens after my Divorce Agreement is approved by a Judge?

By
If you filed a Joint Petition for Divorce in Massachusetts then you will participate in an uncontested divorce hearing and the Judge will then issue Findings of Fact the day of the hearing.  A Judgment of Divorce Nisi will issue after thirty (30) days, and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days. This means that if you file a Joint Petition for Divorce you are not legally and officially divorced until 120 days after the divorce hearing date. If you filed a Complaint for Divorce  then your case will end either with a trial (if you don't settle) or an uncontested divorce hearing (if you settle).  If you reach an Agreement, then a Judgment of Divorce Nisi will issue and be effective as of the date of the uncontested divorce hearing, and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days. This means that if you file a Complaint for Divorce you are not legally and officially divorced until 90 days after the divorce hearing date. Therefore, for 90 - 120 day
2 comments
Read more